Of Love and Marriage: Part Un

Posted by Patrice Smith

The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom, or church, or synagogue. It's a choice you make/ not just on your wedding day, but over and over again/ and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife. ~Barbara De Angelis
Marriage, according to the Mirriam-Webster dictionary, is the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law. But, what leads to marriage in the first place? Long ago there was only one answer to this question...Love. Nowadays, the reasons for marriage seem a bit skewed, wouldn't you say?

I consider marriage to be a sacred union between two individuals, a tight bond. For this to occur the highest level of love should exist - unconditional love. I started reflecting on this topic after browsing the television and stopping at MTV's "most expensive weddings" for a minute. At that moment it was fun to watch. I got a real kick out of it. It wasn't until afterward that it really dawned on me...It's truly amazing how people go above ad beyond for this particular...event? 

It seems the institution of marriage has become more of an event, or a show, rather than an intimate ceremony celebrated with close family and friends commemorating the love between two individuals. 
Marriage seems to have come down to, who will have the most expensive ring? the most lavish/expensive dress, the largest cake, the most flowers, the best location...Do any of these things signify the amount of love one partner has for the other? It would seem that way. It would seem that everyone is trying to outdo each other to, in some way, prove that they  are the most loving couple. It's somewhat outrageous.  

Your thoughts?

7 comments:

  1. Robin said...

    Oh yeah ..so true..people spend all their time and energy on the wedding and forget about spending time on the marriage..all of our couple friends except for one (but they are very unhappy)are divorced and most had the huge weddings...this is a sad fact..me and the hubs got married on a cliff in our town with 30 peeps and then went to a restaurant..and here we are 22 years later...But...we also put a lot of work ( emotional, relational and psychological)into it ..daily ..and that is why we have grown together...no quick fix..no instant gratification..and no looking outside the marriage to fix our problems...Ok thats it for now..Im off my soapbox..Lolol...but you are very right..!

  2. protoworkannie said...

    I love what you quote "The real act of marriage takes place in the heart..." 101% agreed and I should stick your article on my board to remind all girls. Thanks.

  3. Matty said...

    Sometimes it comes down to that old adage, that women spend their entire lives dreaming of their wedding day. And they want it to be everything they ever dreamed of, and more. So they go all out, forgetting that it's really all about the marriage, and not about the wedding, or the day, or the reception.

  4. The Invisible Seductress said...

    Hi sweet gal!!!! This is a great post..All of yours are though!!! I am looking for the simpler things in life again. Love me first and see what happens. I agree with you whole heartedly here. The reasons people get married are so messed up! I had to learn to be alone, still learning, it's a hard lesson though.

    hugs

  5. HalfCrazy said...

    hey Trice....been a while....

    But i thoroughly agree with you. The meaning, the symbolism of this sacred combining of hearts and lives has been watered down to become less than. Marriage was actually the first abstract institution created by God....He married the man and the woman before he created the sabbath and just after he'd created all the other tangible things in the world.....

    It's due some respect, a long overdue return to it's rightful status....on a pedestal in our hearts and minds!!!

  6. Patrice said...

    Thanks all for the input...
    Part Deux, coming soon

  7. Badixcai said...

    Very well put, alot of people are also more fascinated with the idea of being married for its social status and commercial exuberance...The union is now concurrent with the best proposal or best ring...and in alot of cases family worth.

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